Honeymoon Horror Stories – IV

Okay, no more lazy. This post isn’t going to write itself.

So where were we?

Ah yes. Chindi. All suited up, wearing our fancy ass bandanas and shades and leg guards and dipped-in-awesomesauce jackets. At 8:30 am, loading the fancy Ladakh carriers with our luggage and flashy yellow tarpoline sheets.

Yes, we carried tarpoline. Mister is paranoid when he travels. And also, we are the more prepared bikers you’ll ever meet. Yeah. That one sounds about right.

So imagine this. Two cool-as-hell bikers, so cool that people were stopping and clicking photos of us. One guy asked is he could click me on the bike. Kinda sorta posing like this:

Yeah. You wish. *pic borrowed from the huffington post site*
Yeah. You wish.
*pic borrowed from the huffington post site*

After I had responded to that question with a resounding imaginary slap and sure-as-hell-no-you-jerk-get-out-of-my-face-you-on-crack-or-what, I turned to Mister, rolled my eyes suggestively, and mouthed the words: You saw that right?

Let’s just get out of here. He didn’t look amused. Wonder why not.

And then the fucking bike just refused to start. All the know-how I had gathered about bike mechanic’ry was bubbling inside of me and so I went batcrap crazy on Mister, bombarding him with questions as onlookers marveled at how savvy I was.

Is the fuel tap on? And the ignition? It can’t be the spark plug, we just changed it! It must be the rain. 

That R-word brought back memories of all the hanky that was pankied the night before, but then I looked at Mister and that brought back memories of my dad glaring at me for interrupting him while he fiddled with the cooler or the fridge or any other sundry household electronic item that needed his immediate attention.

Anything else?

Sorry.

He poked into various parts of the bike with his toolkit for a good ten minutes. That’s funny, right?

While Mister did the poking, I went to the reception to check if they could find us a mechanic. The nearest one was about 10 kms away, and I batted my eyelids and made puppy faces until the manager finally called him.

It took an hour and a half for the guy to reach. He fixed the bike after some tinkering. Apparently rain water had seeped into one of the engine thingies.

Mister was really pissed that this happened, but then he realized that it was our honeymoon and he was really bringing my spirit down, so he calmed down. I was also all oh let’s just put this behind us and enjoy the ride, but to be honest I’d had enough, and then some.

But the rest of the ride was pretty (and) uneventful. Like, really really uneventful.  So uneventful that I nearly jumped off the bike because I was bored and had nothing to do.

Until this happened.

A couple of hours later, we reached Tirthan Valley, which is where the next horror took place. And no, it wasn’t the bike. Not this time. Something else happened. I’ll tell you about that in my next post.

I know you hate me for dragging a story (that you probably aren’t even enjoying that much) out like this, but good things come to those who wait 😉

I know I told you Chindi was awesome and showed you pictures to prove it, but Tirthan is even better.

My next post will have tons of pics of me and Mister in this setting:

Yes. There was a river and we caught us some trout.
Yes. There was a river and we caught us some trout.

So I’ll see you soon, then?

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anawnimiss

Blogger. Crazy bitch. Stalkee. Weirdo magnet. Wannabe housewife. Corporate Slave. Find me at anawnimiss.wordpress.com!

10 thoughts on “Honeymoon Horror Stories – IV”

  1. Cool! How come the cars look like they are driving down the middle of the road? They didn’t leave you guys much space. And I like that type of scenery. Thanks Ana.

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    1. Driving in the hills is a pain, Paul. It’s barely enough space for two cars to pass side-by-side, and sometimes not even that much. But the rivers totally make up for it! Are roads wider in the hills where you’re at?

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      1. Generally speaking the roads in the mountains here in Canada are quite wide and well marked (lines, signs, guard rails, etc) We have numerous “grades” of roads. The big ones are superhighways with divided 2 to 5 lanes each way. The local roads between villages can be quite small but are still generally a clear lane each way and often with shoulders. There are unimproved roads that can be only a single lane but they are not paved and are often closed in winter time (we get a great deal of snow in some places). We do a lot of logging and natural resources here (big country without many people) and so there are logging roads and oilfield access roads, etc that criss-cross the empty areas. Unless you know where you’re going though, it is not a good idea to get onto those roads as they have no towns and no services and sometimes go hundreds of miles and then dead-end.(if a log camp has moved or shut down). India is a big country(compared to others in the world) but Canada is massive – you could fit 3 Indias inside our borders). And we only have 1/35 the population of India. (35 million vs 1.2 billion). If you want to see some really unusual roads you should visit our Arctic areas in the winter. We have small towns and villages in our North that have no roads and can only be accessed for a few months by sea because of pack ice. We build “ice roads” to these towns in the winter when the ground and lakes and ocean are frozen that cross water and muskeg. They freeze so solid that huge tractor trailers can be driven across the ice and swamps to service the towns. Some of these roads are hundreds of miles long and cross dozens of miles of ice. We actually have a couple of TV shows that highlight the lives of the ice-roads truckers and the problems they face.

        Anyway, we have lots of countryside with a lot of different types of roads but most public roads are wide and well marked.

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        1. The ice roads in the Arctic areas seem very interesting and something I’ve never seen before! I’ve been looking at google images for the last half an hour, so you can imagine how much I’m clamoring to visit Canada right now!

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          1. They are fascinating- the very idea of driving a truck across frozen water is mind-blowing to me. I used to own a tractor-trailer and hauled goods all over Canada and the U.S. but never in the North. I’d love to give it a try. We have a few very short ice roads across rivers here in Ontario where I live, but they are generally just short cuts of maybe a mile at the most. The trick is to drive at a steady but slow speed. Apparently the truck bends the ice and creates a wave in the water underneath – if you go too fast the ice won’t handle the strain and will break up. Up north it gets bitter cold in th winter – sometimes below -50 celcius. Oddly enough they don’t get a lot of snow but the winds are killers and when it does snow, the visiblity in the wind drops to zero and it is impossible to see let alone move. Even in the villages, they string rope between the buildings during these times so that pedistrians don’t get lost and wander out onto the ice pack and die.

            There are Polar Bears in these areas and no one goes out alone or out of town without carrying rifles. Polar bears are very beautiful, intelligent and deadly – they eat humans (or any meat for that matter). The really odd thing is that when in the right mood (God only knows how that happens) they are extremely playful. The female bears are deadly protective of cubs.

            Just some of the unique hazards of travelling the ice roads in the North. I’d love to try it and if I get a chance I’ll give you a call Ana – you could be the co-pilot. Ha! ;D In return I would expect a road trip in India – I’ve heard it can be very beautiful.

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