Someone from school sent me a friend request a while ago. At first I couldn’t recognize her because her profile pic was really hazy, but after I glanced through her pictures I realized I knew her. Hell, I even envied her back then!
I think I told you that I was a really
clueless introverted kid at school. I wasn’t good at anything. Okay, I could run like the wind, but that was mostly because I was thin as a reed and there was practically no air resistance. This girl was the exact opposite.
She was one of the most popular girls in school. If Indian schools had cheerleaders, she’d be one. Or if we had sororities, she’d be the bitch that wouldn’t allow girls like me to join. Or she would let girls like me join just so she could make fun of us – you know what I mean? She was, in fact, my nemesis. Not that she knew! I didn’t think that she ever even noticed me.
So when she sent me a friend request, it took me by surprise. What would she, queen-bee-turned-mother-of-three want with me? So I accepted the request and waited with the proverbial bated breath.
Two days, and nothing.
And then a little message popped up. You’re Ana from school, right?
Duh! If you weren’t sure why would you send me a friend request? Yes. I typed one word, testing the waters. She has been known to bite. At age 17, no less. (At this point I’m wondering if one of you has the I-know-who-you-are look on your face.)
Remember me???? I’m nemesis from section B!!!! I was in Gautam’s class!!
Remember you? The only 34B girl who ever wore a bright red bra under a white shirt when none of us had nothing to show for our fourteen years! The only girl who would willingly walk on the railing side of the staircase and made sure the boys downstairs got a good view. Trust me, a lot of people tried very hard to forget what you looked like!
Yes of course I remember you. How are you?
I’m gud yaar! Aur bata kaisi hai? Waao! I didn’t knew you have became so hot yaar!
That’s odd! I didn’t remember her having bad grammar. I remember that she was pretty and most boys were at her feet but really? And at the cost of sounding a little immature I must admit that (a) I’m a grammar and spelling snob and I hate SMS lingo, and (b) sometimes when I don’t like the person I’m talking to and they seem uncomfortable with English, I stubbornly refuse to switch to Hindi. Yeah I’m snooty like that. I’m also honest. Live with it.
Thanks. You look great too!
Of course she didn’t look nice anymore. Just to help you visualize, let me tell you that this exchange was taking place around Halloween and she looked like a hollow pumpkin in all her pics. Except her profile pic, which was clearly from the 1990s.
Thanku yaar!! Aur bata! Shaadi kar li? Bachche. vachche? (Thanks! Tell me, how are you? Married yet? Kids?)
Married? Yes, twice!
I don’t know why I did that. I think I just wanted to shock her and see how she would react. Awkward silence for a whole week!
I finally got curious today so I went to her profile. And believe it or not, she has unfriended me. But of course I don’t hate her that much. In fact, I could even try to like her in the way that Mister likes his fish. Dead. 😉
Were you popular in school? Would you judge someone based on their relationship/marital status? Have you ever been judged unfairly? Do you wish you had given someone a second chance?
30 thoughts on “of fish & cheaps”
No…no….yes….and maybe. I was not popular in school at all. Most of it was my fault. I was convinced that I would be a famous rock star. I spend most of my time rehearsing with my band and skipped all of the school social events. So, I became an outsider and not popular. I still see people that I attended school with. Time has not been kind to many of them. 🙂 I don’t use Facebook because of situations that you’ve described above. I was hurt on occasion by them in the past, and won’t give them a 2nd opportunity to do it again.
Damn! I can’t believe the first one is a no. I thought being a musician was such a cool thing, and your being away for rehearsals should’ve made you more desirable! You clearly went to the wrong type of school! 😉
And you know what, sometimes I do that too – close myself to people who hurt me because they are just not worth trying to be friends with. Sometimes people are just better off left in the past!
And then sometimes I think about all the people I’ve been mean to, and then I begin to soften a little coz I feel like I could do with a couple of second chances. But only sometimes. 🙂
There was always a rift between the athletic community and the artist community. I guess that I’m equally responsible for rejecting them as they are me. Either that or they simply did not understand the awesomeness of my bass playing. 🙂
Two sides of the same coin, then.
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i have lately noticed that I have become v boring…may b i was boring all my life and just realized it now.I don’t hate people anymore, I have stopped having grudges and prejudices…i either like them or feel indifferent…I so want to bitch about somebody now….but am alarmed to find that I have lost that skill… :O
I guess with time you realize that it is futile to harbor grudges. It’s a good thing to be able to let go of dead weight, so indifference works, I guess! I am still a little hyper when it comes to people and it looks like it’ll take me a while to get where you are!
but i have started to hate this phase…its too bland…i have to work my way back… 🙂
Aarrgh! Now I wish we had someone in common to bitch about. 😛
I was just thinking about high school today and how glad I am to be 30 years removed. It was a small school (13 in my class) and everyone did everything (sports, drama, academics). We were too small to have cliques, but the mean girls were still in charge.
I get all wiggly talking about it. And oh my goodness…I had some HAIR back in those days 🙂
Why are mean girls always in charge? Who makes them in charge? Huh!
Thirteen people sounds cosy (and therefore more manageable); it must’ve been difficult to bunk class, though! We had classes with 28-30 people, and it was a riot!
And about the hair – if it makes you feel better, mine has never been any good.
That was rude! And I’d say you’re better off without her!! I don’t know whether I was popular but yes, everyone knew me 😛 because our group of 5 made amazing friends. I know that rest of the class were jealous of our friendship!! We are still known as a bunch of 5 amongst our classmates rather than individuals 🙂
Judged unfairly? If you count a jealous classmate’s mom asking me in front of 25 people “hey RIG, you had gone to B for studies right? You came back?” to imply that I came back home permanently as I couldn’t make it. (this was after I had left my hometown to study for my CA). I would love to say I care two hoots but frankly things like these make me uncomfortable in my skin and I could feel my face burning when she asked that. I remember mumbling something like ‘holiday’, (which was true) and scampering away to my friends. I had nothing to be afraid of. I was indeed on a holiday! But her question made me feel incompetent nevertheless, I don’t know how people manage to make me feel like an idiot all the time!
It so happened afterwards that the jealous classmate had to take a drop for a year and yet, couldn’t get admitted to the college she boasted she would enter! And had this happened without her mom cornering me in front of 25 people, I would have defended her when people laughed at her after this incident. Because frankly, I don’t think this career-race or relationships or how much you earn or how big your home is defines what you are! Right?
Did I give her second chance? I talk decently with her. But she makes me uncomfortable. I don’t know why but people who judge others too much make me *very* uncomfortable. I find it difficult to breathe around them.
Wow! That was a long reply! You touched a nerve somewhere! 😛
I’m glad touched that nerve, coz now I know you a little bit better 😉
Btw, that lady was not unlike a lot of people I know. She did it on purpose, obviously! Since you were quiet, she must’ve been really proud of how she showed you your place, but if you were to answer back, you would be labeled non-sanskaari and badtameez.
When her daughter didn’t get into that college, I’ll bet this lady was more worried about people ridiculing her rather than her daughter’s career graph. Such people are constantly looking for an opportunity to drag you down just to look like they’re on top; to them everything is a rat race. It’s actually sad when you think about it!
The reason why you’re uncomfortable around these people is that intrinsically you’re a very different person; and if you think about it, being YOU is way better than being ahead of everyone else in a rat race, coz even if they win, they’re still just rats!
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Hahaha! I just imagined her face being changed with that of ratatouille rat and I can’t stop laughing!!!
What you say is true. People like these and your classmate there are just rats. They would like to think of themselves as superior to others and hence this stupidity!
Oh but the ratatouille rat was so adorable! Why would you say something like that! 😦
He was! Totally was and hence, I find it funny!!! 😛
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This is so disgusting ..
I was this really good girl in school ,so teachers knew me..Not much popular with students though..
Then I was all sorted, studying and participating in extracurricular activities..
But now, I am pretty clueless about everything..
I would never judge someone based on their relationship status …
I do not remember ever being judged unfairly..
Friends have mostly left and moved on and have never been back.. So I never had the opportunity to give some one a second chance…
Girl, I envy you! To go through life without being judged unfairly is something most of us can only dream of.
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It is just that I have a weak memory I guess …
What the hack? You are married and having two kids, does it something which can stop someone to be friend with you? It is really bad…. But anyways, it is better not to have such friends in our life…
Alok, I don’t have kids 🙂
I have been married twice, and I guess she couldn’t imagine being friends with me because of that!
I am aware of that Ana, I just wanted to say that hearing that (which seems true to her) she un-friend you was surprising to me.
Oh cool. Sorry, I misunderstood.
I’m glad I don’t have to pretend to be friends with her – good riddance!
I don’t have any fond memories of my school days where I was the average kid who got through exams with no amazing grades, kept a finger across his mouth when asked to and wished the day after Diwali was a holiday too. But those are all the moments I remember. I hate my Engg College, i never met my roomies once even though I stayed with them for all four years after my graduation. The only memories of my Engg College were the movies I saw those days, one every day 🙂
A lot of my engineer friends say exactly that – the only fond memories they have of college are about how they bunked class and did something else.
That has to do with a different kind of rat race, but I guess that is a story for another day 😉
Haha snooty you. I was a non entity at school, clumsy, dumb and nobody wanted to become my friend. Well, that’s true about me. Always sitting in a corner and enjoying being myself. I wouldn’t want to change anything about that, as I look back:)
It’s almost like you’re talking about me. Except the ‘enjoying myself’ bit. All the years I was in school, I was miserable because I wasn’t popular. Now that I look at what became of the popular ones in the end (if this girl is any standard to go by), I thank my stars!
Awesome! Who can’t relate to school snobs? I was the girl who didn’t exist until a few months before I graduated; it took me 12 years to become familiar in school – and then they sent me away! I’m glad in a way – couldn’t have tolerated the spotlight anyway!
P.S – Loved the way you brought in Cumberbatch – so everyone’s upset over it, huh? 😉
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I was actually thankful to finally go to college because I had run out of ways to be socially awkward around kids in school.
And as for Cumberbatch getting engaged and letting this go *points at herself*?
His loss. Hmpf!
No.No way, bcos thats insane. I dont know.Yes, pls.
I had to read that part about getting Unfriended twice.And had to go back and read entire the post again.B’cos I was sure I missed something.I could not understand she had unfriended you b’cos you said you married twice.Bulb in my head went on only when I came across the questions at the end.
Red bra and white shirt? Seriously?
Btw, am sure she envies YOU now, and thats the reason she couldnt stand to be friends wih you.
P.S. I cringed when I read ‘didn’t knew’.
The girl was a nutcase! The least she could’ve done was to unfriend me a few days later! Why make it so obvious? Reflects poorly on her life choices and general disposition, doesn’t it? As if the red bra under a white shirt weren’t enough! 😉
PS. Cringing at didn’t knew is probably a universal phenomenon!