of opinions

Here’s a rough translation for my non Hindi-speaking friends:

Rapes can be prevented through a careful development of character.

1.  20 years ago, entire families would sit gathered round the television set watching the Ramayana. A scene with Ram, Sita, or Hanuman would result in exultations, folded hands, and heads bowed in respect.  We would wait all week for Sundays to arrive, for that is when we got to experience this out-of-the-world experience of watching our favorite gods come alive on T.V. We could think of nothing else, talk of nothing else all week.

2. Now, however, all we watch is pornography. You can pay the local shopkeeper Rs. 10 and he will load 500 porn video clips on your mobile. These clips are available to anyone and everyone, be it a 10 year old boy or an old man. This, in my opinion is the main reason rapes are happening. These porn videos are affecting the mindsets of hundreds of people.

3. We should have a system in place where the Senior Superintendent of Police in each district should give instructions to each police station to strictly punish those who download pornography on their computers or mobile phones by humiliating them in front of the public for five days and then putting them behind bars for six months.

4. Every single city has a Residents Welfare Association (RWA). These RWAs should keep close checks on drivers, gardeners, domestic helps, etc. They should randomly raid groups of said people sitting together to check their phones, because this is the strata of society that sits together and makes crude  remarks on women passing by. Keeping them in check will help the cause a lot.

5. I will respect every woman as though she were my mother/sister/daughter. Over their lifespan, people sign a lot of documents in banks, hospitals, and for employment purposes. Wherever signatures are required on a form, they should also be asked to sign against the statement –  I will respect every woman as though she were my mother/sister/daughter.  This will act as a reminder of the pledge every man should take. It will reinforce the good values almost like a small dose of a much-needed medicine.

Guess where that came from. An auto-rickshaw driver. Raghuveer has a stack of photocopies of this essay and he hands them to his sawaaris (passengers), hoping that one day the world will become safer for the women in his family.

Now I don’t think that things are as black and white as he thinks, but who would’ve thought that a barely-educated middle-aged Indian man in a blue collar job would have such well-defined views about sexual abuse. I’m impressed and thankful.

What do you think? Tell him at +91-995-835-8540.

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of remockable opinions about rape

A certain Indian minister has finally decoded rapes: sexual violence is apparently caused by non vegetarian food, especially chicken and fish.

A lot of people I know are sharing this piece of news online expressing their disbelief at how “educated” ministers can say such things. I think they mean literate. But anyway, I wanted to do my bit by talking about it, but words are failing me. Therefore I must come up with my own words as a tribute to men like these – my own fictionary.

of the time I checked out my naked attacker

I know I know, it’s been a while and you’ve forgotten all about the naked attacker. Here’s something to jog your memory:

Then suddenly, someone snuck up on me and grabbed me from behind. I went from ooooh, so he wants to make out on the road, that’s forward but I like the idea to he’s still talking, why can’t I hear his voice behind me to so it can’t be him to holy fuck who is this behind me to fuck fuck a naked man’s penis is pressed into my thong-clad ass and I can feel his balls and his unfriendly arm is around my neck what does he want from me within a split second.

Remember now? Awesome. Moving along, then!

So I was late from work another time, about  a month after I was attacked. Imagine my horror when I had to park in the EXACT SAME SPOT as that fateful night.

of my naked attacker

This is a story from about a year ago, which is when I had just moved into the last house I lived in. It was a few blocks away from the mister’s house (which is where I live now). It was also around the same time I started working at this hell hole of an office. In fact, it may have been the first month of my new found love for western formals and high heels.

I was working late that night, so it was 10:30 by the time I got home. I had no energy to cook, so the mister offered to save some food for me. I was to call him when I reached home, and he would bring it to me while he walked his dog. Yes, he’s sweet like that.

Since it was late, I had to park a little far from home, in a dimly lit corner next to a park. I would normally not park that far, but beggars =/= choosers. You know. So I was in the car for about 5 min, putting the gear lock in place, moving all the papers out of the car, putting my pen drive in the bag. I got out, and called the mister. I was going tick-tock-tick-tock as I simpered on the phone. He said something barely borderline-funny, and I laughed really loud. But then, we were newly-beds, so I found ALL his jokes funny.